第 44 部分阅读
theanintroducedhiselfasjeffandsaidthathewasthe“studsanager”atthestation.blokvistaskedhitoexplainwhatthateant.jeffgavehiasidelonglookandconcludedthatblokvistwasnotfrotheseparts.heexplainedthatastudsanagerwasrathertheequivalentofafinancialanagerinabank,althoughheadinisteredsheep,andthata“station”wastheaustralianwordforranch.
theycontinuedtoconverseasjeffcheerfullysteeredthejeepatabouttenkiloetresanhourdownintoaravinewith0°slope.blokvistthankedhisluckystarsthathehadnotatteptedthedriveinhisrentalcar.heaskedwhatwasdownintheravineandwastoldthatitwasthepasturelandfor700headofsheep.
“asiunderstandit,cochranfarisoneofthebiggerranches.”
“we’reoneofthelargestinallofaustralia,”jeffsaidwithacertainprideinhisvoice.“werunabout9,000sheephereinthemakawakadistrict,butwehavestationsinbothnewsouthwalesandwesternaustralia.wehave60,000plushead.”
theycaeoutfrotheravineintoahillybutgentlerlandscape.blokvistsuddenlyheardshots.hesawsheepcadavers,bigbonfires,andadozenranchhands.severalenseeedtobecarryingrifles.theywereapparentlyslaughteringsheep.
involuntarily,hethoughtofthebiblicalsacrificiallabs.
thenhesawawoanwithshortblondehairwearingjeansandared-and-whitecheckedshirt.jeff. compedafewyardsawayfroher.
“hi,boss.we’vegotatourist,”hesaid.
blokvistgotoutofthejeepandlookedather.shelookedbackwithaninquisitiveexpression.
“hi,harriet.it’sbeenalongtie,”hesaidinswedish.
noneoftheenwhoworkedforanitacochranunderstoodwhathesaid,buttheyallsawherreaction.shetookastepback,lookingshocked.theensawherresponse,. compedtheirjoking,andstraightenedup,readytointerveneagainstthisoddstranger.jeff’sfriendlinesssuddenlyevaporatedandheadvancedtowardblokvist.
blokvistwaskeenlyawarehowvulnerablehewas.awordfroanitacochranandhewouldbedonefor.
thentheoentpassed.harrietvangerwavedherhandinapeacefulgestureandtheenovedback.shecaeovertoblokvistandethisgaze.herfacewassweatyanddirty.herblondehairhaddarkerroots.herfacewasolderandthinner,butshehadgrownintothebeautifulwoanthatherconfirationportraithadproised.
“haveweetbefore？”shesaid.
“yes,wehave.iamikaelblokvist.youwereybabysitteronesuerwheniwasthreeyearsold.youweretwelveorthirteenatthetie.”
ittookafewsecondsforherpuzzledexpressiontoclear,andthenhesawthatshereebered.shelookedsurprised.
“whatdoyouwant？”
“harriet,i’notyoureney.i’notheretoaketroubleforyou.butineedtotalkwithyou.”
sheturnedtojeffandtoldhitotakeover,thensignalledtoblokvisttofollowher.theywalkedafewhundredfeetovertoagroupofwhitecanvastentsinagroveoftrees.sheotionedhitoacapstoolataricketytableandpouredwaterintoabasin.sherinsedherface,driedit,andwentinsidethetenttochangehershirt.shegottwobeersoutofacooler.
“so.talk.”
“whyareyoushootingthesheep？”
“wehaveacontagiousepideic.mostofthesesheepareprobablyhealthy,butwecan’triskitspreading.we’regoingtohavetoslaughterorethansixhundredintheingweek.soi’notinaverygoodood.”
blokvistsaid:“yourbrothercrashedhiscarintoatruckafewdaysago.heusthavediedinstantaneously.”
“iheardthat.”
“froanita,whocalledyou.”
shescrutinisedhiforalongoent.thenshenodded.sheknewthatitwaspointlesstodenythefact.
“howdidyoufinde？”
“wetappedanita’stelephone.”blokvistdidnotthinktherewasanyreasontolie.“isawyourbrotherafewinutesbeforehedied.”
harrietvangerfrowned.heethergaze.thenhetookofftheridiculousscarfhewaswearing,turneddownhiscollar,andshowedherthestripeleftfrothenoose.itwasstillredandinflaed,andhewouldprobablyalwayshaveascartoreindhiofmartinvanger.
“yourbrotherhadhungefroahook,butbythegraceofgodypartne
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rarrivedintieto. comhikillinge.”
harriet’seyessuddenlyburned.
“ithinkyou’dbettertellethestoryfrothebeginning.”
ittookorethananhour.hetoldherwhohewasandwhathewasworkingon.hedescribedhowhecaetobegiventheassignentbyhenrikvanger.heexplainedhowthepolice’sinvestigationhadetoadeadend,andhetoldherofhenrik’slonginvestigation,andfinallyhetoldherhowaphotographofherwithfriendsinj？rnv？gsgataninhedestadhadledtotheuncoveringofthesorrowsbehindtheysteryofherdisappearanceanditsappallingsequel,whichhadendedwithmartinvanger’ssuicide.
ashetalked,dusksetin.theenquitworkfortheday,fireswerestarted,andpotsbegantosier.blokvistnoticedthatjeffstayedclosetohisbossandkeptawatchfuleyeonhi.thecookservedthedinner.theyeachhadanotherbeer.whenhewasfinishedharrietsatforalongtieinsilence.
atlengthshesaid:“iwassohappythatyfatherwasdeadandtheviolencewasover.itneverourredtoethatmartin…i’gladhe’sdead.”
“icanunderstandthat.”
“yourstorydoesn’texplainhowyouknewthatiwasalive.”
“afterwerealisedwhathadhappened,itwasn’tsodifficulttoworkouttherest.todisappear,youneededhelp.anitawasyourconfidanteandtheonlyoneyoucouldevenconsider.youwerefriends,andshehadspentthesuerwithyou.youstayedoutatyourfather’scabin.iftherewasanyoneyouhadconfidedin,ithadtobeher—andalsoshehadjustgotherdriver’slicence.”
harrietlookedathiwithanunreadableexpression.
“sonowthatyouknowi’alive,whatareyougoingtodo？”
“ihavetotellhenrik.hedeservestoknow.”
“andthen？you’reajournalist.”
“i’notthinkingofexposingyou.i’vealreadybreachedsoanyrulesofprofessionalconductinthiswholedisalessthatthejournalistsassociationwouldundoubtedlyexpeleiftheyknewaboutit.”hewastryingtoakelightofit.“oneorewon’takeanydifference,andidon’twanttoakeyoldbabysitterangry.”
shewasnotaused.
“howanypeopleknowthetruth？”
“thatyou’realive？rightnow,youandeandanitaandypartner.henrik’slawyerknowsabouttwo-thirdsofthestory,buthestillthinksyoudiedinthesixties.”
harrietvangerseeedtobethinkingsoethingover.shestaredoutatthedark.mikaelonceagainhadanuneasyfeelingthathewasinavulnerablesituation,andhereindedhiselfthatharrietvanger’sownriflewasonacapbedthreepacesaway.thenheshookhiselfand. compediaginingthings.hechangedthesubject.
“buthowdidyouetobeasheepfarerinaustralia？ialreadyknowthatanitasuggledyouoffhedebyisland,presuablyinthebootofhercarwhenthebridgere-openedthedayaftertheaident.”
“actually,ilayonthefloorofthebackseatwithablanketovere.butno-onewaslooking.iwenttoanitawhenshearrivedontheislandandtoldherthatihadtoescape.youguessedrightthaticonfidedinher.shehelpede,andshe’sbeenaloyalfriendalltheseyears.”
“whyaustralia？”
“istayedinanita’srooinstockholforafeeeks.anitahadherownoney,whichshegenerouslylente.shealsogaveeherpassport.welookedalostexactlylikeeachother,andallihadtodowasdyeyhairblonde.forfouryearsilivedinaconventinitaly—iwasn’tanun.thereareconventswhereyoucanrentaroocheap,tohavepeaceandquiettothink.thenietspencercochran.hewassoeyearsolder；he’djustfinishedhisdegreeinenglandandwashitchhikingaroundeurope.ifellinlove.hedidtoo.that’salltherewastoit.‘anita’vangerarriedhiin1971.i’veneverhadanyregrets.hewasawonderfulan.verysadly,hediedeightyearsago,andibecaetheownerofthestation.”
“butyourpassport—surelysoeoneshouldhavediscoveredthatthereweretwoanitavangers？”
“no,whyshouldthey？aswedishgirlnaedanitavangerwho’sarriedtospencercochran.whethershelivesinlondonoraustraliaakesnodifference.theoneinlondonhasbeenspencercochran’sestrangedwife.theoneinaustraliawashisveryuchpresentwife.theydon’tatchupputerfilesbetweencanberraandlondon.besides,isoongotanaustralianpassportunderyarriednae.thearrangeentfunctionedperfectly.theonlythingthatcouldhaveupsetthestorywasifanitaherselfwantedtogetarried.myarriagehadtoberegisteredintheswedishnationalregistrationfiles.”
“butsheneverdid.”
“sheclaisthatsheneverfoundanyone.butiknowthatshediditforysake.she’sbeenatruefriend.”
“whatwasshedoinginyourroo？”
“iwasn’tveryrationalthatday.iwasafraidofmartin,butaslongashewasinuppsala,icouldpushtheprobleoutofyind.thentherehewasinhedestad,andirealisedthati’dneverbesafetherestofylife.iwentbackandforthbetweenwantingtotellunclehenrikandwantingtoflee.whenhenrikdidn’thavetietotalktoe,ijustwanderedrestlesslyaroundthevillage.ofcourseiknowthattheaidentonthebridgeovershadowedeverythingelseforeveryone,butnotfore.ihadyownprobles,andiwashardlyevenawareoftheaident.everythingseeedunreal.theniranintoanita,whowasstayinginaguestcottageinthepoundwithgerdaandalexander.thatwaswheniadeupyind.istayedwithherthewholetieanddidn’tdaregooutside.buttherewasohingihadtotakewithe—ihadwrittendowneverythingthathappenedinadiary,andineededafewclothes.anitagotthefore.”
“isupposeshecouldn’tresisttheteptationtolookoutattheaidentscene.”blokvistthoughtforaoent.“whatidon’tunderstandiswhyyoudidn’tjustgotohenrik,asyouhadintended.”
“whydoyouthink？”
“ireallydon’tknow.henrikwouldcertainlyhavehelpedyou.martinwouldhavebeenreovediediately—probablysenttoaustraliaforsoesortoftherapyortreatent.”
“youhaven’tunderstoodwhathappened.”
uptothispointblokvisthadonlyreferredtogottfried’ssexualassaultonmartin,leavingharriet’sroleoutofit.
“gottfriedolestedmartin,”hesaidcautiously.“isuspectthathealsoolestedyou.”
harrietvangerdidnotoveauscle.thenshetookadeepbreathandburiedherfaceinherhands.ittookfivesecondsbeforejeffwasbesideher,askingifeverythingwasallright.harrietlookedathiandgavehiafaintsile.thensheastonishedblokvistbystandingupandgivingherstudsanagerahugandakissonthecheek.sheturnedtoblokvistwithherararoundjeff’sshoulder.
“jeff,thisismikael,anold…friendfrothepast.he’sbroughtproblesandbadnews,butwe’renotgoingtoshoottheessenger.mikael,thisisjeffcochran,yoldestson.ialsohaveanothersonandadaughter.”
blokviststooduptoshakehandswithjeff,sayingthathewassorrytohavebroughtbadnewswhichhadupsethisother.harrietexchangedafeordswithjeffandthensenthiaway.shesatdownagainandseeedtohaveadeadecision.
“noorelies.iaeptthatit’sallover.insoesensei’vebeenwaitingforthisdaysince1966.foryearsiwasterrifiedthatsoeoneighteuptoeandsayynae.butyouknohat？allofasuddenidon’tcareanyore.mycriefallsoutsidethestatuteofliitations.andidon’tgiveashitwhatpeoplethinkaboute.”
“crie？”saidmikael.
shegavehianurgentlook,buthestilldidn’tunderstandwhatshewastalkingabout.
“iwassixteen.iwasscared.iwasashaed.iwasdesperate.iwasallalone.theonlyoneswhoknewthetruthwereanitaandmartin.ihadtoldanitaaboutthesexualassaults,butididn’thavethecouragetotellherthatyfatherwasalsoaninsanekillerofwoen.anitahadneverknownaboutthat.butididtellheraboutthecriethatiittedyself.itwassohorriblethatwhenitcaedowntoit,ididn’tdaretellhenrik.iprayedtogodtofivee.andihidinsideaconventforseveralyears.”
“harriet,yourfatherwasarapistandaurderer.itwasn’tyourfault.”
“iknowthat.myfatherolestedeforayear.idideverythingtoavoid…buthewasyfatherandicouldn’trefusetohaveanythingtodowithhiwithoutgivinghisoeexplanation.soiliedandplayedaroleandtrie. comretendthateverythingwasok.andiadesurethatsoeoneelsewasalwaysaroundwhenisawhi.myotherknehathewasdoing,ofcourse,butshedidn’tcare.”
“isabellaknew？”
harriet’svoicetookonanewharshness.
“ofcoursesheknew.nothingeverhappenedinourfailywithoutisabellaknowing.butsheignoredeverythingthatwasunpleasantorshowedherinabadlight.myfathercouldhaverapedeintheiddleofthelivingroorightbeforehereyesandshewouldn’thavenoticed.shewasincapableofacknowledgingthatanythingwaswronginherlifeorine.”
“i’veether.she’snotyfavouriteinthefaily.”
“she’sbeenlikethatherwholelife.i’veoftenwonderedaboutyparents’relationship.irealisedthattheyrarelyoraybeneverhadsexwitheachotherafteriwasborn.myfatherhadwoen,butforsoestrangereasonhewasafraidofisabella.hestayedawayfroher,buthecouldn’tgetadivorce.”
“no-onedoesinthevangerfaily.”
shelaughedforthefirsttie.
“no,theydon’t.butthepointisthaticouldn’tbringyselftosayanything.thewholeworldwouldhavefoundout.myschoolates,allyrelatives…”
“harriet,i’sosorry.”
“iwasfourteenwhenherapedethefirsttie.andduringthenextyearhewouldtakeeouttohiscabin.manytiesmartincaealong.heforcedbotheandmartintodothingswithhi.andheheldyarswhilemartin…hadhiswaywithe.whenyfatherdied,martinwasreadytotakeoverhisrole.heexpectedetobeehisloverandhethoughtitwasperfectlynaturalforetosubittohi.atthattieinolongerhadanychoice.iwasforcedtodowhatmartinsaid.iwasridofoorentoronlytolandintheclutchesofanother,andtheonlythingicoulddowastoakesuretherewasneveranoasionwheniwasalonewithhi…”
“henrikwouldhave…”
“youstilldon’tunderstand.”
sheraisedhervoice.blokvistsawthatseveraloftheenatthenexttentwerelookingathi.sheloweredhervoiceagainandleanedtowardshi.
“allthecardsareonthetable.you’llhavetoworkouttherest.”
shestoodupandgottwoorebeers.whenshecaeback,mikaelsaidasinglewordtoher.
“gottfried.”
shenodded.
“onaugust7,1965,yfatherforcedetogoouttohiscabin.henrikwasaway.myfatherwasdrinking,andhetriedtoforcehiselfone.buthecouldn’tgetitupandheflewintoadrunkenrage.hewasalways…roughandviolenttowardsewhenwewerealone,butthistiehecrossedtheline.heurinatedone.thenhestartedtellingewhathewasgoingtodotoe.thatnighthetoldeaboutthewoenhehadkilled.hewasbraggingaboutit.hequotedfrothebible.thiswentonforanhour.ididn’tunderstandhalfofwhathewassaying,butirealisedthathewastotally,absolutelysick.”
shetookagulpofherbeer.
“soetiearoundidnighthehadafit.hewastotallyinsane.wewereupinthesleepingloft.heputat-shirtaroundyneckandpulleditastightashecould.iblackedout.idon’thavetheslightestdoubtthathereallywastryingtokille,andforthefirsttiethatnightheanage. comletetherape.”
harrietlookedatblokvist.hereyesentreatedhitounderstand.
“buthewassodrunkthatsoehowianagedtogetaway.ijupeddownfrotheloftandfled.iwasnakedandiranwithoutthinking,andendeduponthejettybythewater.hecaestaggeringaftere.”
blokvistsuddenlywishedthatshewouldnottellhianythingore.
“iwasstrongenoughtoshoveanolddrunkintothewater.iusedanoartoholdhiunderuntilhewasn’tstrugglinganyore.itdidn’ttakelong.”
whenshe. comped,thesilencewasdeafening.
“andwhenilookedup,therestoodmartin.helookedterrified,butatthesaetiehewasgrinning.idon’tknowhowlonghewasoutsidethecabin,spyingonus.frothatoentiwasathisercy.hecaeuptoe,grabbedebythehair,andledebacktothecabin—togottfried’sbed.hetiedeupandrapedewhileourfatherwasstillfloatinginthewater.andicouldn’tevenofferanyresistance.”
blokvistclosedhiseyes.hewasterriblyashaedandwishedthathehadleftharrietvangerinpeace.buthervoicehadtakenonanewforce.
“frothatdayon,iwasinhispower.ididwhathetoldetodo.ifeltparalysed,andtheonlythingthatsavedysanitywasthatisabella—oraybeitwasunclehenrik—decidedthatmartinneededachangeofsceneryafterhisfather’stragicdeath,soshesenthitouppsala.ofcoursethiswasbecausesheknehathewasdoingtoe,anditwasherwayofsolvingtheproble.youcanbetthatmartinwasdisappointed.duringthenextyearhewashoeonlyforthechristasholiday.ianagedtokeepawayfrohi.iwentwithhenrikonatriptocopenhagenbetweenchristasandnewyear’s.andduringthesuerholiday,anitawasthere.iconfidedinher,andshestayedwithethewholetie,akingsurethathedidn’teneare.”
“untilyousawhionj？rnv？gsga